1
00:00:01,414 --> 00:00:05,443
♪
2
00:01:01,310 --> 00:01:02,471
(Gordon Smith) Different?
3
00:01:02,545 --> 00:01:04,945
Ok now, what do
you mean different?
4
00:01:05,013 --> 00:01:06,642
Do you understand
what I'm doing here?
5
00:01:06,716 --> 00:01:10,016
I am covering a war...
that's blood, guts, carnage,
6
00:01:10,086 --> 00:01:12,681
men, guns... there is
nothing different.
7
00:01:12,755 --> 00:01:15,281
(Victoria) Listen, how
about I send you down to
8
00:01:15,358 --> 00:01:18,157
Cuba and you can cover
Castro's colonoscopy?
9
00:01:18,227 --> 00:01:21,062
Huh. Huh!
That would be different.
10
00:01:21,131 --> 00:01:24,659
Woooh!! Or let's see if
you can tell the difference
11
00:01:24,735 --> 00:01:28,331
between a
journalist who is oooohhh!!
12
00:01:28,405 --> 00:01:32,638
employed and
oohh! unemployed...ok?
13
00:01:32,709 --> 00:01:34,268
(panting)
14
00:01:35,244 --> 00:01:37,510
What kind of story do
you want me to write?
15
00:01:37,581 --> 00:01:39,516
Look, I need money, okay?
16
00:01:39,583 --> 00:01:41,745
I need money for the Latin
shitholes I'm staying in.
17
00:01:41,818 --> 00:01:45,017
I need money to get a ticket
back to mi casa. Comprende?
18
00:01:45,089 --> 00:01:50,117
No, you listen to me, amigo.
I'm the one who puts that roof
19
00:01:50,193 --> 00:01:55,724
over your head, so your casa
is actually mi casa, got it?
20
00:01:55,800 --> 00:01:57,097
Ooohh!
21
00:01:57,167 --> 00:02:01,333
(John) I've heard your phone
call. You need a story? Here.
22
00:02:02,340 --> 00:02:06,403
I paid two flans for
it, but I can't read.
23
00:02:06,478 --> 00:02:08,070
Can you read it to me?
24
00:02:08,146 --> 00:02:10,513
I don't have time to read
a bedtime story, kid.
25
00:02:10,581 --> 00:02:12,277
Well maybe this story
will help you buy a
26
00:02:12,350 --> 00:02:14,217
room in a Latin shithole.
27
00:02:24,196 --> 00:02:29,396
(Padre Rafael) My name is
father Rafael. This is my diary.
28
00:02:29,468 --> 00:02:32,836
♪
29
00:02:32,905 --> 00:02:36,000
Life here in Mariquita
is wonderful.
30
00:02:37,277 --> 00:02:40,144
We are no different than
many small villages.
31
00:02:40,212 --> 00:02:41,544
We have a church,
32
00:02:41,613 --> 00:02:45,142
a brothel, and a
cow named Parastraika.
33
00:02:46,019 --> 00:02:47,681
There are barely
enough sins to keep the
34
00:02:47,754 --> 00:02:49,483
house of God in business.
35
00:02:58,398 --> 00:03:02,199
We have many beautiful
women in our village.
36
00:03:02,869 --> 00:03:05,566
And there are days,
let's just say,
37
00:03:05,638 --> 00:03:09,337
when wearing a baggy
polyester robe comes in handy.
38
00:03:14,414 --> 00:03:18,978
The men of our village
are definitely not macho.
39
00:03:19,053 --> 00:03:22,922
Well... as long as the
women remember their place.
40
00:03:26,927 --> 00:03:31,023
Although there is one woman,
Rosalba Rodriguez Ramirez
41
00:03:31,098 --> 00:03:35,160
Ola de Valdez, who let's
just say, likes to keep
42
00:03:35,236 --> 00:03:38,537
things under control.
Everybody in town thought she
43
00:03:38,607 --> 00:03:42,702
would be the last woman to get
married. I can't imagine why...
44
00:03:44,845 --> 00:03:48,339
(Rosalba) Will you let your
wife manage the family budget?
45
00:03:48,917 --> 00:03:50,943
Did you go to school?
46
00:03:51,886 --> 00:03:53,913
How often do you bathe?
47
00:03:54,322 --> 00:03:56,348
(Campo Elias) I would
like to be a police officer
48
00:03:56,424 --> 00:03:59,053
if I can get over
my fear of dying.
49
00:03:59,127 --> 00:04:03,588
I own a TV, I do not
need to go to school,
50
00:04:03,665 --> 00:04:07,466
I bathe every
Mondays and Fridays.
51
00:04:07,536 --> 00:04:11,440
Yes, I would allow my
wife to manage the budget
52
00:04:11,507 --> 00:04:14,476
if she is as
beautiful as you are.
53
00:04:14,543 --> 00:04:16,604
Just a police officer?
54
00:04:16,679 --> 00:04:19,740
You could be a sergeant
or even a mayor!
55
00:04:21,284 --> 00:04:25,449
Life in Mariquita was like
one big happy quinceañera.
56
00:04:27,390 --> 00:04:30,986
But as in any fairy tale,
all it takes is a couple of
57
00:04:31,060 --> 00:04:35,657
revolutionaries, with really
bad manners to ruin everything.
58
00:04:42,606 --> 00:04:45,268
(Camacho) Viva la revolucion!
59
00:04:50,047 --> 00:04:55,748
Friends, we are
the people's army.
60
00:04:55,819 --> 00:05:01,190
We ask that you join us,
help us free your country
61
00:05:01,258 --> 00:05:03,751
from the imperialism.
62
00:05:03,828 --> 00:05:07,491
♪
63
00:05:12,804 --> 00:05:14,204
(gun shots)
64
00:05:28,019 --> 00:05:28,987
Ooohh!!
65
00:05:49,141 --> 00:05:50,632
There's only room
for one, I'm sorry.
66
00:05:50,709 --> 00:05:52,041
But they could kill me!
67
00:05:52,111 --> 00:05:54,876
Yes, but I am more important
for the town, mamita.
68
00:05:56,082 --> 00:05:58,641
Oh, um...in case
something happens to you,
69
00:05:58,717 --> 00:06:00,845
I want you to know that I have
always loved you very much,
70
00:06:00,919 --> 00:06:03,583
and... yes... I did
sleep with Ubaldina,
71
00:06:03,657 --> 00:06:05,489
because she was sweet to me.
72
00:06:05,558 --> 00:06:08,857
What can I say, amor? You are just a little
bossy sometimes.
73
00:06:08,927 --> 00:06:10,190
Buena suerte!
74
00:06:14,601 --> 00:06:16,570
Where's the mayor, señora?
75
00:06:17,570 --> 00:06:18,765
Aaahh!
76
00:06:18,838 --> 00:06:20,568
Look, I am going to take
somebody's life here today.
77
00:06:20,640 --> 00:06:22,506
Is up to you which one it is.
78
00:06:28,115 --> 00:06:28,638
Ah!
79
00:06:33,019 --> 00:06:33,749
Quack!
80
00:06:33,821 --> 00:06:35,255
(gun shot)
81
00:06:35,323 --> 00:06:38,760
(Camacho) Everybody over the
age of twelve with a pair of
82
00:06:38,826 --> 00:06:44,561
balls between their legs must
join the revolution today.
83
00:06:47,768 --> 00:06:49,032
(Magnolia) Turn around.
84
00:06:50,404 --> 00:06:52,566
Put this on, Julio.
Put this on.
85
00:06:53,674 --> 00:06:55,302
Ven Julio, cierra los ojos.
86
00:07:03,617 --> 00:07:05,143
(Camacho) Buenas
tardes, señoritas.
87
00:07:05,220 --> 00:07:06,745
Buenas tardes comandante.
88
00:07:06,822 --> 00:07:08,313
Are there any men
in the house?
89
00:07:08,390 --> 00:07:13,727
No...sir...God has blessed us
with only two beautiful girls.
90
00:07:14,863 --> 00:07:16,456
What's your name, bonita?
91
00:07:19,469 --> 00:07:22,529
Julia...
she's mute.
92
00:07:23,205 --> 00:07:27,109
♪
93
00:07:54,971 --> 00:07:57,635
(agonized shouting)
94
00:08:41,820 --> 00:08:44,120
(crying)
95
00:09:16,155 --> 00:09:18,386
(crying)
96
00:09:44,519 --> 00:09:46,784
Is any of this even true?
97
00:09:46,854 --> 00:09:48,913
Priests always tell the truth.
98
00:09:48,989 --> 00:09:50,423
Hah, who told you that?
99
00:09:50,490 --> 00:09:53,188
Keep going...what happened then?
100
00:09:53,728 --> 00:09:54,991
(sighs)
101
00:09:55,062 --> 00:09:56,655
Women were lost.
102
00:09:56,731 --> 00:09:58,164
Without their men,
they didn't know...
103
00:09:58,231 --> 00:09:59,860
(Rafael)... they didn't
know how to be women.
104
00:09:59,934 --> 00:10:01,197
(church bell)
105
00:10:01,269 --> 00:10:03,795
But if they need
help remembering,
106
00:10:03,871 --> 00:10:06,170
I will be there to assist.
107
00:10:12,680 --> 00:10:15,617
♪
108
00:10:16,885 --> 00:10:19,786
Rosalba decided she was
going to be the man...
109
00:10:19,854 --> 00:10:24,691
the woman... the man-woman
and everything in between.
110
00:10:33,268 --> 00:10:35,430
(Magnolia) Don't look at
me, that's a man's job.
111
00:10:35,504 --> 00:10:37,337
I'm not picking up the trash.
112
00:10:39,509 --> 00:10:41,943
A man, man...
ugh.
113
00:10:52,387 --> 00:10:55,620
(Cecilia) Women shouldn't
fix power sockets...
114
00:10:55,692 --> 00:10:57,490
or toilets.
115
00:11:03,866 --> 00:11:05,129
Ubaldina!
116
00:11:06,769 --> 00:11:08,636
Uba!
Where is my milk?
117
00:11:09,807 --> 00:11:11,536
(Ubaldina) I have
not milk her yet...
118
00:11:11,608 --> 00:11:14,908
ooh, maybe I should send
you some of my dresses,
119
00:11:14,978 --> 00:11:17,414
you... surely need them.
120
00:11:24,221 --> 00:11:27,385
Padre... when is the next mass?
121
00:11:28,325 --> 00:11:33,662
Rosalba... God is
available 24/7...
122
00:11:34,932 --> 00:11:37,333
but no one is
coming to church...
123
00:11:38,370 --> 00:11:40,168
the women aren't sinning.
124
00:11:49,214 --> 00:11:52,878
♪
125
00:12:14,906 --> 00:12:19,538
Good evening, I'm
General Ibarra.
126
00:12:19,612 --> 00:12:21,979
I'm here to analyze the damage.
127
00:12:22,048 --> 00:12:24,280
All the men,
step forward...
128
00:12:26,686 --> 00:12:28,120
Where are the men?
129
00:12:28,187 --> 00:12:30,156
(Virgelina) There are no men.
130
00:12:30,222 --> 00:12:31,919
Who's going to
provide us with food?
131
00:12:31,992 --> 00:12:36,087
Or fix the electricity,
or take out the trash?
132
00:12:36,162 --> 00:12:37,721
What are we supposed to do?
133
00:12:37,797 --> 00:12:40,290
We don't have any men
to tell us what to do.
134
00:12:40,367 --> 00:12:43,235
Who is going to give
us money for shopping?
135
00:12:43,303 --> 00:12:47,001
(General Ibarra) What this town
needs... is a strong leader.
136
00:12:47,074 --> 00:12:51,774
How can we have a strong
leader without a strong man?
137
00:12:52,713 --> 00:12:54,615
(Rosalba) What about me?
138
00:12:57,651 --> 00:12:59,745
What about you?
139
00:13:01,221 --> 00:13:03,020
Why don't I become mayor?
140
00:13:03,091 --> 00:13:06,118
(Ubaldina) You don't know
anything about ruling, pendeja.
141
00:13:06,194 --> 00:13:08,219
I know how to give
orders and point fingers.
142
00:13:08,295 --> 00:13:10,458
All women know how
to point fingers.
143
00:13:10,531 --> 00:13:12,295
My husband was the mayor.
144
00:13:12,366 --> 00:13:14,528
It's just for a little while,
145
00:13:14,602 --> 00:13:17,731
until the government
can send a man to rule.
146
00:13:20,842 --> 00:13:23,676
It's either me, or madness.
147
00:13:24,278 --> 00:13:25,804
Take the job.
148
00:13:26,415 --> 00:13:27,507
Vamonos.
149
00:13:29,117 --> 00:13:33,579
I promise to send men
soon... buenas noches.
150
00:13:33,655 --> 00:13:36,955
♪
151
00:13:48,871 --> 00:13:51,136
You would think a town
without sin would be great
152
00:13:51,206 --> 00:13:55,371
news for a priest. But Rosalba
was about to make up for all
153
00:13:55,444 --> 00:13:59,779
the sins that weren't being
committed... God help us all.
154
00:14:02,518 --> 00:14:05,648
Is it true that you want me
to be your assistant mayor?
155
00:14:05,722 --> 00:14:09,090
Cuz my herbalist store has
less and less customers.
156
00:14:09,159 --> 00:14:11,685
Now that men are gone,
no one is wounded,
157
00:14:11,761 --> 00:14:15,755
no one needs condoms,
and women take less aspirins.
158
00:14:17,066 --> 00:14:19,934
Yes. I am going to
need an assistant.
159
00:14:20,003 --> 00:14:23,098
I am going to
transform this town.
160
00:14:24,040 --> 00:14:26,340
(pandemonium)
161
00:14:27,912 --> 00:14:29,175
Ladies, ladies... please.
162
00:14:33,483 --> 00:14:36,454
Ladies, please.
Ladies please, please.
163
00:14:36,854 --> 00:14:38,948
Look, the men will
be back soon enough.
164
00:14:39,023 --> 00:14:41,082
Until then, just do as I say.
165
00:14:41,157 --> 00:14:41,955
Why?
166
00:14:42,026 --> 00:14:43,187
Because I say so.
167
00:14:43,260 --> 00:14:45,957
Are you sure you can
handle this job like a man?
168
00:14:46,030 --> 00:14:48,727
If a man can do
this job, so can I.
169
00:14:49,634 --> 00:14:51,795
There is no such
thing as a weaker sex.
170
00:14:51,869 --> 00:14:55,328
Remember, vaginas can take
more pain than penises.
171
00:14:55,406 --> 00:14:56,568
(gasps)
172
00:15:08,987 --> 00:15:11,013
What would a man do?
173
00:15:45,958 --> 00:15:51,091
(Western music)
174
00:15:55,902 --> 00:15:58,372
(Rafael) Everything
was perfect in our peaceful
175
00:15:58,438 --> 00:16:02,842
little village, until
the day the devil arrived.
176
00:16:03,911 --> 00:16:07,848
I knew it was him, because
he was disguised as a she.
177
00:16:07,915 --> 00:16:12,911
And being a man of the cloth, I
could see right past his C-cups.
178
00:16:12,987 --> 00:16:16,787
And I knew it was El Diablo.
179
00:16:25,033 --> 00:16:26,523
(Cleotilde) I'm in heaven.
180
00:16:33,041 --> 00:16:34,304
Buenas.
181
00:16:34,375 --> 00:16:38,176
I'm señorita Cleotilde
Guarnizo, at your service.
182
00:16:38,246 --> 00:16:41,444
I'm looking for a job
and place to stay...
183
00:16:42,083 --> 00:16:43,450
indefinitely.
184
00:16:43,519 --> 00:16:45,681
I don't think you'd
like to stay here.
185
00:16:45,754 --> 00:16:49,690
We're private people.
We have our ways.
186
00:16:49,757 --> 00:16:52,728
Well, I can make
delicious tortillas,
187
00:16:52,795 --> 00:16:56,061
and give infallible
confidence classes.
188
00:16:56,131 --> 00:16:58,726
I don't know what
"infallible" means but I guess
189
00:16:58,801 --> 00:17:02,169
I can use more confidence.
You could stay in my son's
190
00:17:02,237 --> 00:17:05,264
empty room if you don't
mind my chickens. Fidel...
191
00:17:05,341 --> 00:17:06,605
... y Castro
192
00:17:06,676 --> 00:17:10,009
Aside from feminists, are
you ladies communists as well?
193
00:17:10,079 --> 00:17:11,570
Huh?
194
00:17:16,920 --> 00:17:19,354
Don't you just love to
read before going to bed?
195
00:17:19,421 --> 00:17:22,153
I don't know how
to read or write.
196
00:17:22,926 --> 00:17:27,022
We don't need no education.
What for? We are women.
197
00:17:31,001 --> 00:17:33,766
The school has been
closed since men left.
198
00:17:33,837 --> 00:17:36,432
They even took our
teacher, señora.
199
00:17:36,506 --> 00:17:39,305
Señorita.
Never been married.
200
00:17:39,376 --> 00:17:41,572
Every man I ever met was a pig.
201
00:17:41,644 --> 00:17:43,237
Well, there are no men here.
202
00:17:43,313 --> 00:17:46,216
They are all either
dead or gone.
203
00:17:46,283 --> 00:17:48,218
Well, that's wonderful.
204
00:17:49,285 --> 00:17:51,049
Terrible...
205
00:17:52,356 --> 00:17:54,723
but wonderful.
206
00:18:02,967 --> 00:18:05,869
(Western music)
207
00:18:16,615 --> 00:18:17,742
Can I help you?
208
00:18:17,816 --> 00:18:19,045
You?
209
00:18:19,117 --> 00:18:21,881
Ha... no,
no I don't think so.
210
00:18:21,952 --> 00:18:24,218
I wanna speak to the
Mayor, not the maid.
211
00:18:24,289 --> 00:18:25,848
I the Mayor.
212
00:18:35,233 --> 00:18:38,636
Have you ever been a
teacher, Señora Cleotilde?
213
00:18:38,704 --> 00:18:40,138
Señorita.
214
00:18:40,206 --> 00:18:43,573
After spending almost
twenty years in chastity,
215
00:18:43,642 --> 00:18:45,942
one likes to be acknowledged
with the proper title.
216
00:18:47,413 --> 00:18:49,973
Very impressive
credentials for one year.
217
00:18:50,049 --> 00:18:54,612
Military, surfer... circus?
218
00:18:55,521 --> 00:18:56,819
But what did you do before?
219
00:18:56,889 --> 00:18:58,380
I'm afraid that
for personal reasons,
220
00:18:58,458 --> 00:19:00,324
I won't be able to
answer that question.
221
00:19:00,393 --> 00:19:03,363
Well, there's no doubt you're
capable of doing the job.
222
00:19:03,429 --> 00:19:05,159
But, who are you?
Where are you from?
223
00:19:05,231 --> 00:19:07,462
Do you have any relatives?
Do you wax or shave?
224
00:19:07,533 --> 00:19:09,560
Are you a hemaphrodite?
What do you do?
225
00:19:10,571 --> 00:19:12,767
Do you have anyone else
to do the job, Mayor.
226
00:19:13,806 --> 00:19:15,001
Maybe I do...
227
00:19:17,611 --> 00:19:18,874
Actually, I don't.
228
00:19:18,946 --> 00:19:21,347
♪
229
00:19:21,415 --> 00:19:22,906
Any questions?
230
00:19:25,586 --> 00:19:27,248
Ladies...
231
00:19:28,455 --> 00:19:30,356
girls? Come on!
232
00:19:30,991 --> 00:19:33,961
I bet I know more
about men than you do.
233
00:19:34,828 --> 00:19:36,694
(giggling)
234
00:19:36,763 --> 00:19:37,958
Name, please.
235
00:19:38,031 --> 00:19:39,432
La Gringa.
236
00:19:40,401 --> 00:19:41,664
That's what they call
me in the brothel.
237
00:19:41,736 --> 00:19:43,671
How can a brothel
run without men?
238
00:19:44,771 --> 00:19:47,241
Yeah, that's why we're here.
239
00:19:47,308 --> 00:19:48,742
We're bored.
240
00:19:48,810 --> 00:19:52,713
♪
241
00:20:02,625 --> 00:20:06,083
It's been two
months, thirteen days
242
00:20:06,161 --> 00:20:11,430
and six hours since
our last client. (whines)
243
00:20:11,500 --> 00:20:13,799
(Lucrecia) Well since
you have nothing to do,
244
00:20:13,869 --> 00:20:16,930
let's get properly trained
for when the men come back.
245
00:20:18,707 --> 00:20:22,109
Now remember,
in the pleasure business,
246
00:20:22,178 --> 00:20:25,411
you're never too old
to learn something new.
247
00:20:26,282 --> 00:20:31,744
Unique sexual positions,
but also personal pleasure.
248
00:20:31,820 --> 00:20:33,119
Aahh!
249
00:20:33,190 --> 00:20:36,388
So what you are going to do...
is you're going to contract
250
00:20:36,459 --> 00:20:41,329
your muscles inside your cuchis,
ok? And you're gonna squeeze!
251
00:20:43,833 --> 00:20:46,735
I call this, the "boa."
252
00:20:46,803 --> 00:20:48,135
Ladies!
253
00:20:48,205 --> 00:20:49,468
(gasps)
254
00:21:04,322 --> 00:21:06,223
(moaning)
255
00:21:06,557 --> 00:21:10,824
Now... let's go to our clitoris.
256
00:21:12,129 --> 00:21:13,791
Right here.
257
00:21:13,864 --> 00:21:16,265
Right here on top.
258
00:21:16,334 --> 00:21:20,396
Oh yes, that is the most
tender part of your body.
259
00:21:20,471 --> 00:21:22,997
So if you know
how to play with it,
260
00:21:23,975 --> 00:21:29,243
you yourself will take
you straight to the moon.
261
00:21:29,914 --> 00:21:33,682
I call it my happiness button.
262
00:21:33,752 --> 00:21:37,655
♪
263
00:22:37,718 --> 00:22:40,688
(phone rings)
264
00:22:41,288 --> 00:22:43,587
(Victoria) Yes,
Gordon I got your text.
265
00:22:43,657 --> 00:22:46,957
Man eating Amazon
women, really Gordon?
266
00:22:47,027 --> 00:22:49,623
Tell me something, are you
doing mushrooms down there?
267
00:22:49,698 --> 00:22:51,860
I want that story by Sunday.
268
00:22:51,933 --> 00:22:53,423
Boss, you're killing me.
269
00:22:53,500 --> 00:22:56,060
Now I've only got three days
to find the feminist town.
270
00:22:56,136 --> 00:22:59,505
Just make it happen, alright? Because if
you don't,
271
00:22:59,574 --> 00:23:02,874
I'm going to dedicate
the cover story to...
272
00:23:03,744 --> 00:23:05,941
the Presidential elections
in... Where you're from?
273
00:23:06,014 --> 00:23:06,709
(Guy) Honduras.
274
00:23:06,781 --> 00:23:07,908
Honduras.
275
00:23:07,982 --> 00:23:11,043
Nobody cares who the next
President of Honduras is.
276
00:23:11,119 --> 00:23:13,282
Hello? Hello?
277
00:23:14,989 --> 00:23:17,515
Would you please stop
hanging up on me?
278
00:23:26,334 --> 00:23:30,670
Mayor, we must discuss the
pressing need for procreation.
279
00:23:30,740 --> 00:23:32,641
Procreation?
280
00:23:33,943 --> 00:23:37,436
But that's not really one of our
basic needs right now, Padre.
281
00:23:37,513 --> 00:23:40,813
We need to focus on electricity
and cleaning up the streets.
282
00:23:40,883 --> 00:23:44,286
But it is our obligation to God
283
00:23:44,354 --> 00:23:46,379
to ensure the
survival of our people.
284
00:23:46,455 --> 00:23:49,118
Yes, I know... that is
why I have asked the
285
00:23:49,191 --> 00:23:50,785
Lord for a truck full of men.
286
00:23:50,861 --> 00:23:53,194
The road is blocked.
You may never see the
287
00:23:53,263 --> 00:23:55,629
postman again,
let alone any other males.
288
00:23:55,698 --> 00:23:56,495
You're right.
289
00:23:56,565 --> 00:23:58,398
First things first.
290
00:23:58,468 --> 00:24:00,733
We have to start getting
the women of the village to
291
00:24:00,804 --> 00:24:04,536
start having baby boys. That
way the village will survive.
292
00:24:05,710 --> 00:24:07,143
Have faith.
293
00:24:13,083 --> 00:24:17,179
In the name of the father,
the son, and of the holy spirit.
294
00:24:18,655 --> 00:24:24,960
Dear Lord, show us the
way... we besiege thee.
295
00:24:30,134 --> 00:24:31,534
What?
296
00:24:35,306 --> 00:24:36,673
No, Lord.
297
00:24:39,110 --> 00:24:42,274
With all due respect,
my sweet Lord, no.
298
00:24:44,883 --> 00:24:46,442
I can't.
299
00:24:47,886 --> 00:24:49,478
I can't.
300
00:24:49,554 --> 00:24:54,016
I won't, I can't, I won't.
Lord, I cannot.
301
00:24:54,092 --> 00:24:58,052
Lord I cannot. I cannot, I
cannot, I cannot, I cannot,
302
00:24:58,130 --> 00:25:01,760
I cannot, I won't, I won't,
I won't, God, I won't.
303
00:25:01,834 --> 00:25:04,861
Lord, you have
sacrificed so much.
304
00:25:07,974 --> 00:25:10,442
I will bear that cross.
305
00:25:12,344 --> 00:25:16,942
I am your humble servant God,
and if it is your will,
306
00:25:19,152 --> 00:25:21,120
then I will do it.
307
00:25:21,753 --> 00:25:23,416
I will do it.
308
00:25:27,861 --> 00:25:29,159
No, no, no no no no no, padre.
309
00:25:29,229 --> 00:25:32,688
You are the embodiment of
morality in our community.
310
00:25:32,765 --> 00:25:34,927
This is not my idea.
311
00:25:35,001 --> 00:25:36,663
This is his idea.
312
00:25:36,736 --> 00:25:41,436
The Lord, it is his
will... or... her will.
313
00:25:41,508 --> 00:25:42,737
Why don't we ask God to
314
00:25:42,809 --> 00:25:44,779
miraculously get us
all pregnant? Yes?
315
00:25:44,845 --> 00:25:47,474
If there is no village,
there is no mayor.
316
00:25:47,548 --> 00:25:50,450
You need these baby boys.
317
00:25:50,950 --> 00:25:52,613
It is divine will.
318
00:25:52,686 --> 00:25:55,121
I heard God's voice
loud and clear.
319
00:26:01,229 --> 00:26:07,566
(church bells)
320
00:26:19,981 --> 00:26:21,779
Ladies and...
321
00:26:24,085 --> 00:26:25,553
ladies.
322
00:26:26,888 --> 00:26:30,917
Our town is in danger of
disappearing if we do not
323
00:26:30,993 --> 00:26:34,156
reproduce. But there is hope.
324
00:26:34,963 --> 00:26:40,164
Padre Rafael is willing to
break his holy vow of chastity
325
00:26:40,236 --> 00:26:43,637
in order to help us stay alive.
326
00:26:43,705 --> 00:26:48,406
I would be willing to risk
spending a much longer
327
00:26:48,477 --> 00:26:54,109
time in purgatory...
just to serve you.
328
00:26:54,183 --> 00:26:59,247
Ay padrecito... and
how will you serve us? Hmm?
329
00:26:59,322 --> 00:27:02,384
The procreation
campaign consists of
330
00:27:02,459 --> 00:27:04,290
impregnating twenty women.
331
00:27:04,360 --> 00:27:07,057
And we would pray that
some of the newborns
332
00:27:07,129 --> 00:27:09,861
would hopefully be males.
333
00:27:09,933 --> 00:27:10,696
That's absurd!
334
00:27:10,767 --> 00:27:12,793
That's great!
335
00:27:15,605 --> 00:27:19,373
You don't even have a
uterus... please, I mean...
336
00:27:21,445 --> 00:27:24,575
Only women under forty
will be accepted.
337
00:27:24,649 --> 00:27:27,208
That is not fair, what about me?
I like to "ciquie chiquie" too.
338
00:27:27,284 --> 00:27:28,047
Ay mama...
339
00:27:28,118 --> 00:27:29,211
What?
340
00:27:29,286 --> 00:27:31,722
The participants should
expect a visitation.
341
00:27:31,789 --> 00:27:33,451
What kind of visitation?
342
00:27:33,524 --> 00:27:36,721
A divine visitation.
343
00:27:37,995 --> 00:27:41,990
And out of respect to God,
you are to remove all religious
344
00:27:42,066 --> 00:27:47,903
images from the place where the
holy act will be consummated.
345
00:27:47,972 --> 00:27:51,101
No feelings involved.
346
00:27:52,243 --> 00:27:55,874
You will not be making
love to Padre Rafael.
347
00:27:55,948 --> 00:27:57,973
You will be making love to God.
348
00:27:58,049 --> 00:27:59,415
(thunder)
349
00:28:04,490 --> 00:28:06,049
The body of Christ.
350
00:28:06,125 --> 00:28:07,717
Amen.
351
00:28:11,330 --> 00:28:12,195
Body of Christ.
352
00:28:12,264 --> 00:28:13,254
Amen.
353
00:28:24,376 --> 00:28:26,141
Body of Christ.
354
00:28:26,212 --> 00:28:27,180
Amen.
355
00:28:30,349 --> 00:28:31,544
Body of Christ.
356
00:28:31,617 --> 00:28:32,881
Amen.
357
00:28:36,489 --> 00:28:39,549
Ma, do I really have to
do it for the first time
358
00:28:39,625 --> 00:28:40,719
with a priest?
359
00:28:40,794 --> 00:28:42,160
Yes.
360
00:28:42,228 --> 00:28:46,598
Your first sexual experience
should be meticulously planned,
361
00:28:46,666 --> 00:28:51,832
leaving no room for impulse,
intuition, and sudden passion.
362
00:28:53,039 --> 00:28:56,704
Do you mean like when
I stroke my nipples,
363
00:28:56,777 --> 00:28:59,144
and it feels like a
colony of ants marching?
364
00:28:59,213 --> 00:29:01,374
I've never felt
a colony of ants.
365
00:29:01,448 --> 00:29:04,681
I bet father Rafael
is not a good lover.
366
00:29:04,752 --> 00:29:06,186
Sounds like my husband.
367
00:29:08,656 --> 00:29:10,453
God rest his soul.
368
00:29:14,595 --> 00:29:17,087
When are you doing
it with the priest?
369
00:29:17,164 --> 00:29:19,464
Me? I am not doing
it with the priest.
370
00:29:19,534 --> 00:29:21,229
You are going to do it for me.
371
00:29:21,302 --> 00:29:22,861
Me?
372
00:29:23,804 --> 00:29:27,264
But I haven't done it since
my husband passed away,
373
00:29:27,342 --> 00:29:30,176
five years, eleven months
and seven days ago.
374
00:29:31,112 --> 00:29:33,274
Do you remember all
the steps, mijita?
375
00:29:33,347 --> 00:29:35,180
Not again mami, come on...
376
00:29:35,250 --> 00:29:36,513
What steps?
377
00:29:38,720 --> 00:29:42,919
Step One,
Un beso on the lips.
378
00:29:42,991 --> 00:29:46,086
But then put your
tongue inside his mouth
379
00:29:46,161 --> 00:29:48,562
and move it in circles.
380
00:29:48,630 --> 00:29:52,226
Step two, grab his hands
and put them on both
381
00:29:52,300 --> 00:29:54,735
your beautiful and sweet lemons.
382
00:29:55,904 --> 00:29:59,603
Step three, check out
if he is excited.
383
00:29:59,675 --> 00:30:03,133
You know, touch him down there
and if it is as flaccid as a
384
00:30:03,211 --> 00:30:10,244
flan, touch him some more until
he is as hard as a chicken bone.
385
00:30:10,319 --> 00:30:13,016
♪
386
00:30:13,089 --> 00:30:14,819
I'm a virgin.
387
00:30:16,392 --> 00:30:21,024
I would expect nothing less
from you, my little angel.
388
00:30:21,732 --> 00:30:24,496
I always wanted to
sleep with the angels.
389
00:30:56,600 --> 00:31:01,301
I'm not gonna put my tongue in
your mouth, I'm too religious.
390
00:31:12,283 --> 00:31:17,415
It's not your tongue in my mouth
or my tongue in your mouth.
391
00:31:17,488 --> 00:31:19,889
It's God's tongue in our mouths.
392
00:31:19,958 --> 00:31:21,018
Ok.
393
00:31:45,352 --> 00:31:48,480
Behold, this is a man.
394
00:31:56,196 --> 00:31:57,095
Where am I?
395
00:31:57,897 --> 00:31:58,695
Where am I?
396
00:32:00,533 --> 00:32:03,002
Oh... is that?
Is that?
397
00:32:03,069 --> 00:32:04,765
Is that? Is that?
398
00:32:11,678 --> 00:32:13,203
Do you like it?
Do you like it?
399
00:32:15,883 --> 00:32:18,114
Father, can I make
some adjustments?
400
00:32:18,185 --> 00:32:18,776
Yeah...
401
00:32:18,852 --> 00:32:19,683
Ok.
402
00:32:20,987 --> 00:32:23,082
This is better, right?
403
00:32:23,157 --> 00:32:25,752
Oh forgive me Father,
cuz I'm sinning!
404
00:32:25,826 --> 00:32:27,488
Yes! I feel it! I feel it!
405
00:32:27,561 --> 00:32:28,654
I feel it!
I feel it!
406
00:32:29,597 --> 00:32:30,895
Mami, mami!
407
00:32:32,667 --> 00:32:33,965
Hallelujah! Hallelujah!
408
00:32:34,936 --> 00:32:35,995
God likes this!
409
00:32:36,070 --> 00:32:37,937
Your vagina is like a bird trap!
410
00:32:49,318 --> 00:32:50,410
Cramp!
411
00:32:50,484 --> 00:32:52,113
I got a cramp.
412
00:32:52,187 --> 00:32:54,588
Two hundred
seventy-three holy visitations
413
00:32:54,656 --> 00:32:57,125
were performed
without God's luck.
414
00:32:57,192 --> 00:32:59,662
None of the women got
pregnant from Dios.
415
00:32:59,729 --> 00:33:03,859
The rebels were shooting bullets
and I was shooting blanks.
416
00:33:08,438 --> 00:33:12,397
Hola padre, I'm
ready for my duty.
417
00:33:12,474 --> 00:33:15,934
My member doesn't
obey the Lord anymore.
418
00:33:16,479 --> 00:33:19,415
Even God rested
on the 7th day.
419
00:33:20,049 --> 00:33:22,644
But what about our
holy visitations?
420
00:33:30,561 --> 00:33:32,859
It will not rise to the heavens.
421
00:33:41,171 --> 00:33:43,662
When God stopped
pimping me out...
422
00:33:43,740 --> 00:33:45,038
the natives grew restless.
423
00:33:45,108 --> 00:33:46,441
You used us!
424
00:33:46,510 --> 00:33:48,877
If you can't make love or
babies, what is the use of men?
425
00:33:48,946 --> 00:33:51,074
You can't serve us father...
426
00:33:51,148 --> 00:33:53,811
And I've slept with a thousand
men, but I haven't lied.
427
00:33:53,884 --> 00:33:55,284
I gave you my cherry.
428
00:33:55,352 --> 00:33:57,617
I taught you my
personal Kama Sutra.
429
00:33:57,688 --> 00:33:59,623
And I didn't even
charge you on Sunday!
430
00:33:59,690 --> 00:34:04,651
Ladies, ladies, the bible
says patience is a virtue...
431
00:34:04,728 --> 00:34:06,663
(Magnolia) Oh come on!
Nobody understands that book.
432
00:34:06,730 --> 00:34:10,099
I want a book that doesn't
disgrace a man who loves a man.
433
00:34:10,168 --> 00:34:11,568
Or women who love women.
434
00:34:11,636 --> 00:34:13,797
I see what's going on here...
435
00:34:13,871 --> 00:34:16,467
you guys are all
on your periods!
436
00:34:16,541 --> 00:34:17,702
(gasps)
437
00:34:17,776 --> 00:34:19,438
♪
438
00:34:33,592 --> 00:34:35,457
(Gordon) God abandoned
me and they abandoned God.
439
00:34:35,527 --> 00:34:38,122
And this is how the story
of these crazy women ends.
440
00:34:38,664 --> 00:34:40,690
Aw, come on.
No, no, no, no.
441
00:34:40,766 --> 00:34:42,291
No, it can't end there, kid,
442
00:34:42,368 --> 00:34:45,394
it can't end there, there's
gotta be more to the story!
443
00:34:46,071 --> 00:34:48,632
Hey! Kid!
There's gotta be more!
444
00:34:51,410 --> 00:34:56,542
Hey... mister, hold
on, hold on a second.
445
00:35:00,653 --> 00:35:02,020
That's my diary.
446
00:35:02,089 --> 00:35:03,387
You are
padre Rafael...
447
00:35:03,457 --> 00:35:05,289
Yes, I'm padre Rafael.
448
00:35:06,892 --> 00:35:08,952
I'm sorry,
this belongs to me.
449
00:35:09,696 --> 00:35:12,359
So everything in this
story is, is true?
450
00:35:12,432 --> 00:35:15,630
Yes it's true!
Can you believe it?
451
00:35:15,702 --> 00:35:18,570
A place ruled by
savage amazon women?
452
00:35:18,638 --> 00:35:21,904
They can't even make
little baby boys!
453
00:35:22,843 --> 00:35:25,814
Sounds like a front page story
to me, come on, come on...
454
00:35:26,780 --> 00:35:29,272
(Rafael) I still know
what's going on in Mariquita.
455
00:35:29,349 --> 00:35:33,549
God tells me everything.
Even the good gossip.
456
00:35:33,621 --> 00:35:34,850
We need a new mayor...
457
00:35:34,922 --> 00:35:37,288
Yeah, yeah, Rosalba, Rosalba
hasn't done a darn thing.
458
00:35:39,994 --> 00:35:41,792
We have no electricity...
459
00:35:41,863 --> 00:35:43,422
And there's no more men...
460
00:35:43,498 --> 00:35:45,364
And my flower is dry...
461
00:35:47,034 --> 00:35:50,004
Ok, calm down!
Everybody, calm down!
462
00:35:51,405 --> 00:35:54,273
Ok. I am leaving.
Let's go girls!
463
00:35:54,342 --> 00:35:56,539
♪
464
00:35:59,747 --> 00:36:01,807
I wish there was a man here.
465
00:36:08,023 --> 00:36:09,115
Wait!
466
00:36:09,190 --> 00:36:10,955
Wait... Stop!
467
00:36:11,026 --> 00:36:12,050
Stop, stop, stop!
468
00:36:12,127 --> 00:36:15,791
Wait, wait, wait,
wait, stop! Stop! Stop!
469
00:36:15,864 --> 00:36:17,332
We should keep moving.
470
00:36:18,168 --> 00:36:19,658
I will be brief.
471
00:36:20,135 --> 00:36:24,231
Wouldn't it be wonderful
to live together as equals?
472
00:36:24,306 --> 00:36:25,570
No!
473
00:36:26,075 --> 00:36:28,101
Fine! Then go to hell,
all of you.
474
00:36:28,178 --> 00:36:31,045
With your scrawny chickens
and your stinky cow.
475
00:36:31,113 --> 00:36:32,775
Bitches!
476
00:36:33,683 --> 00:36:37,381
You really think,
behind those mountains,
477
00:36:37,453 --> 00:36:39,684
you are going to
find a paradise?
478
00:36:39,756 --> 00:36:42,920
Without violence and poverty?
479
00:36:44,527 --> 00:36:49,466
A place like that, we have
to create for ourselves.
480
00:37:03,379 --> 00:37:07,044
(Ubaldina) Ah! I cannot
believe she called us bitches!
481
00:37:07,518 --> 00:37:11,320
I guess it's better to share her
milk than to lose my vaca...
482
00:37:11,389 --> 00:37:13,914
All I really need is five
eggs for me and my sister.
483
00:37:13,991 --> 00:37:15,550
The rest we can share.
484
00:37:15,626 --> 00:37:18,095
Who knows? If we
stop eating meat,
485
00:37:18,162 --> 00:37:20,723
we might even
lose some weight.
486
00:37:21,833 --> 00:37:23,630
Si... try...
487
00:37:23,701 --> 00:37:27,571
♪
488
00:37:27,639 --> 00:37:31,872
That's my chicken.
Give it to me.
489
00:37:31,943 --> 00:37:34,174
No. They're my chickens!
490
00:37:41,219 --> 00:37:42,483
The clock stopped?
491
00:37:42,555 --> 00:37:45,319
Huh... I hope it's not a sign.
492
00:37:45,390 --> 00:37:48,326
Now, you just need
the help of someone...
493
00:37:48,393 --> 00:37:49,987
how should I put it?
494
00:37:50,062 --> 00:37:54,260
More qualified in stuff
you are not qualified...
495
00:37:54,332 --> 00:37:56,267
join forces so to speak.
496
00:37:57,837 --> 00:37:59,362
Like who?
497
00:37:59,572 --> 00:38:01,063
Cleo...
498
00:38:01,140 --> 00:38:02,699
Estas loca?
499
00:38:02,775 --> 00:38:05,540
I am not joining
forces with that woman!
500
00:38:06,178 --> 00:38:07,202
(knocking)
501
00:38:09,248 --> 00:38:11,774
Cecilia told me you
wanted to see me, mayor?
502
00:38:11,851 --> 00:38:13,377
Oh she did?
503
00:38:16,155 --> 00:38:19,957
Do you think the clocks stopped
because of the lack of men?
504
00:38:21,828 --> 00:38:23,456
Well, that makes sense.
505
00:38:23,530 --> 00:38:27,433
The male concept of time
is about productivity
506
00:38:27,501 --> 00:38:30,164
and counting achievements.
507
00:38:33,273 --> 00:38:37,472
I want to create
the female concept of time.
508
00:38:39,646 --> 00:38:41,410
We could call it...
509
00:38:42,316 --> 00:38:45,219
"The female concept of time."
510
00:38:46,253 --> 00:38:47,983
What kind of time is that?
511
00:38:49,323 --> 00:38:51,020
I have no idea.
512
00:38:57,331 --> 00:38:58,527
(gasp)
513
00:38:59,834 --> 00:39:01,962
Menstruation, what
about menstruation?
514
00:39:02,036 --> 00:39:05,530
I mean, that's an exclusive
female condition.
515
00:39:06,408 --> 00:39:10,902
Yes... We can have a
menstruation calendar.
516
00:39:10,978 --> 00:39:15,110
Instead of 30 days,
we will have 28 suns.
517
00:39:15,718 --> 00:39:18,744
And every 28 suns a
woman has to have a goal,
518
00:39:18,820 --> 00:39:21,757
or something she
wants to improve...
519
00:39:23,459 --> 00:39:26,896
Or a flaw she
wants to eliminate.
520
00:39:33,202 --> 00:39:34,864
I wish I was stronger.
521
00:39:37,240 --> 00:39:41,142
But... you are the
strongest person in town.
522
00:39:44,180 --> 00:39:46,649
I wish I could smile more.
523
00:39:48,251 --> 00:39:51,152
You should... you have
a beautiful smile.
524
00:40:05,201 --> 00:40:06,727
I should leave, mayor.
525
00:40:07,405 --> 00:40:09,464
What? No, you have to stay.
526
00:40:09,539 --> 00:40:11,872
We have to figure
out how it all works.
527
00:40:14,378 --> 00:40:15,573
Oh and...
528
00:40:16,414 --> 00:40:18,349
you can call me Rosalba.
529
00:40:19,917 --> 00:40:22,079
Ok... Rosalba.
530
00:40:24,922 --> 00:40:27,721
♪
531
00:40:29,226 --> 00:40:31,024
(Rafael) The women's
first call was to
532
00:40:31,095 --> 00:40:33,792
collect all the animals
for a communal farm.
533
00:40:33,864 --> 00:40:37,199
Rosalba insisted that
Ubaldina share her cow.
534
00:40:37,269 --> 00:40:41,296
Afterall, Rosalba had to
share her husband, the pig.
535
00:40:48,046 --> 00:40:52,450
They cultivated lemons all
summer, they used then for food,
536
00:40:52,517 --> 00:40:55,646
drink and to highlight
their hair, who knew?
537
00:41:01,893 --> 00:41:04,863
The women decided to
make love, not war.
538
00:41:04,930 --> 00:41:06,694
War was invented by men.
539
00:41:06,765 --> 00:41:09,861
Huh... isn't nagging
a type if warfare?
540
00:41:17,710 --> 00:41:20,236
They would have the
cleanest of all villages,
541
00:41:20,313 --> 00:41:22,781
everyone would
be required to work.
542
00:41:25,184 --> 00:41:27,517
Even if it's not
on their backs...
543
00:41:35,261 --> 00:41:38,164
How many women does it
take to change a lightbulb?
544
00:41:38,232 --> 00:41:40,963
In their new
utopia, only one...
545
00:41:42,703 --> 00:41:43,931
Aaahh!!
546
00:41:44,904 --> 00:41:46,168
Ow!
547
00:41:48,242 --> 00:41:51,542
Ok, maybe two might
be a better idea.
548
00:41:53,715 --> 00:41:55,182
Ow!!
549
00:41:58,218 --> 00:42:00,016
(Cleotilde) No one said
it was going to be easy.
550
00:42:00,087 --> 00:42:02,819
No one said it was
going to be this hard.
551
00:42:04,925 --> 00:42:05,756
Ow!!
552
00:42:05,826 --> 00:42:07,089
(Rafael) Female time?
553
00:42:07,160 --> 00:42:10,393
I guess that means everyone
is going to late from now on.
554
00:42:19,841 --> 00:42:22,868
(Victoria) Oh for God's sakes...
this better be good, Gordon.
555
00:42:22,944 --> 00:42:26,437
Don't fire me yet boss. I got it. Front
page all the way.
556
00:42:26,514 --> 00:42:28,915
A town of women
in a land of men.
557
00:42:28,983 --> 00:42:30,975
Women in a land
full of men? Jesus,
558
00:42:31,052 --> 00:42:35,252
that's my whole career! I've
been there and I've done that!
559
00:42:35,324 --> 00:42:36,621
Boss, listen to me.
560
00:42:36,691 --> 00:42:38,557
Whatever you are doing now isn't
important, listen to me...
561
00:42:38,626 --> 00:42:41,153
It's not a metaphor, the
priest told me it's real!
562
00:42:41,230 --> 00:42:44,564
I would like you
to bring me that story
563
00:42:44,633 --> 00:42:50,869
and to get your ass back
here as soon as you can.
564
00:42:55,879 --> 00:42:57,005
Impressive...
565
00:42:58,447 --> 00:43:00,882
It's just going to need
a little more contrast.
566
00:43:02,385 --> 00:43:04,217
Padre!
Come on, let's go.
567
00:43:04,287 --> 00:43:05,880
You're gonna take
me to this town!
568
00:43:05,956 --> 00:43:09,119
No Gordon, you're going
to have to go on your own.
569
00:43:09,191 --> 00:43:11,024
I'm not going back
to those bitches.
570
00:43:11,094 --> 00:43:15,293
I told you, that town is full of
filthy, ferocious she-devils.
571
00:43:15,365 --> 00:43:16,958
Yeah, yeah, yeah,
I read the diary.
572
00:43:17,033 --> 00:43:20,128
They're crazy amazon,
cannibalistic, man-hating women.
573
00:43:20,203 --> 00:43:21,762
I need you to take me there.
574
00:43:21,838 --> 00:43:22,498
No.
575
00:43:22,572 --> 00:43:24,200
How about for four tacos?
576
00:43:24,274 --> 00:43:25,140
No.
577
00:43:25,209 --> 00:43:26,939
How 'bout pesos?
You want pesos?
578
00:43:27,011 --> 00:43:32,244
You Americans, with your hot
pockets and your Larry King.
579
00:43:32,315 --> 00:43:34,808
I'm not going no matter how
much dinero you give me, Gordon.
580
00:43:34,885 --> 00:43:37,650
Those women eat men like
you and me for dinner.
581
00:43:38,889 --> 00:43:40,858
Can you at least make me a map?
582
00:43:42,126 --> 00:43:43,287
Yes.
583
00:43:43,361 --> 00:43:45,990
How many pesos did
you say you had left?
584
00:43:46,063 --> 00:43:49,091
♪
585
00:44:08,053 --> 00:44:12,423
Señorita Cleotilde, why are
you walking around half naked?
586
00:44:13,525 --> 00:44:16,017
It took thousands of
generations for the female
587
00:44:16,094 --> 00:44:18,690
body to reach perfection.
588
00:44:18,765 --> 00:44:20,199
Why hide it?
589
00:44:20,266 --> 00:44:21,790
You know, I could,
I could penalize
590
00:44:21,867 --> 00:44:23,495
you for your public nudity!
591
00:44:23,568 --> 00:44:26,038
Yeah? Why don't you?
592
00:44:26,105 --> 00:44:27,437
I should.
593
00:44:28,808 --> 00:44:32,209
You know, don't you think that
some parts of the female body
594
00:44:32,277 --> 00:44:35,305
should be covered, if only
because they are sensitive?
595
00:44:35,381 --> 00:44:39,079
Being fully dressed
feels not natural.
596
00:44:39,819 --> 00:44:42,618
After all, we're
all women, right?
597
00:44:42,689 --> 00:44:43,918
It's just us.
598
00:44:45,558 --> 00:44:48,426
♪
599
00:44:53,700 --> 00:44:55,328
Put your
clothes back on!
600
00:44:56,135 --> 00:44:58,298
♪
601
00:45:09,883 --> 00:45:11,819
Hello mayor...
602
00:45:11,886 --> 00:45:14,218
Mayor... you look
very nice, mayor.
603
00:45:16,457 --> 00:45:20,589
Mayor, you
finally joined us.
604
00:45:29,771 --> 00:45:32,400
You have nice
tanned skin, mayor.
605
00:45:34,374 --> 00:45:39,609
You have beautiful
moles all over your body,
606
00:45:39,681 --> 00:45:42,117
all in the right
places, it seems.
607
00:45:45,186 --> 00:45:48,850
Do you have any moles
hidden somewhere?
608
00:45:50,126 --> 00:45:52,118
Oh... I have a mole here.
609
00:45:54,663 --> 00:45:55,960
And... I think I see one here.
610
00:45:56,030 --> 00:45:57,225
Oohh!
611
00:46:04,006 --> 00:46:07,272
Your body puts the morning
sky to shame, mayor.
612
00:46:12,448 --> 00:46:14,008
You think so?
613
00:46:14,584 --> 00:46:19,180
You don't think I'm a little
bit too masculine or bossy?
614
00:46:19,255 --> 00:46:22,590
No... I think you're beautiful.
615
00:46:26,229 --> 00:46:28,460
You have another mole...
here.
616
00:46:32,402 --> 00:46:34,371
And one on your breast.
617
00:46:38,708 --> 00:46:43,704
♪
618
00:47:27,292 --> 00:47:28,282
(scream)
619
00:47:42,274 --> 00:47:45,143
Oh Ceci, I have a
question for you...
620
00:47:46,179 --> 00:47:50,274
Let's pretend you have
feelings for someone, anyone
621
00:47:50,349 --> 00:47:55,721
really, and those feelings
are of the unnatural kind.
622
00:47:56,623 --> 00:47:58,854
You have feelings for
Cleotilde, don't you?
623
00:47:58,925 --> 00:47:59,518
I do.
624
00:48:00,693 --> 00:48:02,559
I've never felt
this for a woman.
625
00:48:02,629 --> 00:48:05,292
That was before I saw
Cleotilde's breasts.
626
00:48:05,365 --> 00:48:09,360
Those breasts should appear on
our flag in the coat of arms.
627
00:48:09,436 --> 00:48:13,202
Cleotilde seems like a
very passionate woman.
628
00:48:13,840 --> 00:48:21,578
First, send her a poem written
on a perfumed piece of paper.
629
00:48:21,648 --> 00:48:26,280
Second, and most important,
don't tell anyone.
630
00:48:28,355 --> 00:48:32,020
♪
631
00:48:37,197 --> 00:48:40,362
I wonder what it's like to be
in love with another woman...
632
00:48:40,435 --> 00:48:43,268
do you think it's wrong?
633
00:48:43,337 --> 00:48:45,432
Love can never be wrong.
634
00:48:45,507 --> 00:48:47,339
Just like hate can
never be right.
635
00:48:51,279 --> 00:48:53,942
Cecilia and I are madly in love.
636
00:48:58,253 --> 00:49:03,590
One sun, I was untangling
Cecilia's hair when a piece of
637
00:49:03,658 --> 00:49:07,994
the comb accidentally broke
off and fell into her bosom.
638
00:49:08,064 --> 00:49:11,523
We made some silly
joke about it, (panting)
639
00:49:11,600 --> 00:49:14,660
and then she dared me to
go in there and retrieve it.
640
00:49:14,736 --> 00:49:18,731
I said sure, but only if I
could do it with my teeth.
641
00:49:18,808 --> 00:49:21,471
We've been together ever since.
642
00:49:35,524 --> 00:49:36,514
Hey!
643
00:49:36,592 --> 00:49:37,491
Wake up!
644
00:49:38,294 --> 00:49:39,126
(gasp)
645
00:49:40,297 --> 00:49:42,095
The Mayor told me
to hand you this.
646
00:49:47,371 --> 00:49:48,430
The mayor?
647
00:49:54,112 --> 00:49:58,572
"A poem dedicated to the very
graceful Cleotilde Guarnizo.
648
00:49:58,648 --> 00:50:03,212
Your charms have defeated me,
señorita, I need to know,
649
00:50:03,287 --> 00:50:07,849
do you love me, do you love
me, as much as I love you?
650
00:50:07,924 --> 00:50:12,329
Please say you do.
Yours faithfully, Rosalba,
651
00:50:12,397 --> 00:50:15,731
widow of the unfaithful
lying dog Campo Elias.
652
00:50:31,984 --> 00:50:34,419
(Ubalinda) You know,
I thought about--
653
00:50:34,486 --> 00:50:37,081
like yours, but, um,
where should I get it?
654
00:50:48,600 --> 00:50:51,536
I cannot compete with
the beauty of women like
655
00:50:51,603 --> 00:50:54,972
Ubaldina Rosales de Sanchez.
656
00:50:56,109 --> 00:50:58,669
I cannot control the
speed of my heart.
657
00:50:58,744 --> 00:51:00,838
And I've never felt
this unbalanced.
658
00:51:01,880 --> 00:51:04,680
What if she doesn't like
me the way I like her?
659
00:51:09,055 --> 00:51:10,489
Hi.
660
00:51:10,557 --> 00:51:11,855
Huh?
661
00:51:13,059 --> 00:51:14,994
Shouldn't you be
writing your goals?
662
00:51:15,061 --> 00:51:17,587
I came to give you this.
It's from Cleotilde,
663
00:51:17,665 --> 00:51:21,431
Mayor, but I swear I
don't know what it says.
664
00:51:21,501 --> 00:51:25,029
Ok, well, I don't have
time to read this right now.
665
00:51:25,105 --> 00:51:28,565
We are working on our
goals... so should you.
666
00:51:30,677 --> 00:51:32,111
I will.
667
00:51:33,481 --> 00:51:34,642
Goals.
668
00:51:43,224 --> 00:51:46,490
"This poem is dedicated with
all my heart to the always
669
00:51:46,560 --> 00:51:50,862
jovial Rosalba, beautiful Mayor
of the village of Mariquita.
670
00:51:50,932 --> 00:51:52,695
Ooohh!!
671
00:51:54,935 --> 00:51:57,997
Last night, I dreamt
of your kisses.
672
00:51:58,073 --> 00:52:02,806
Your kisses were so sweet,
that when I opened my eyes,
673
00:52:02,877 --> 00:52:08,146
I found sugar on my lips. I
can't wait until night falls,
674
00:52:08,216 --> 00:52:13,052
hence I'm going to take
a nap. Meet me at the river.
675
00:52:13,121 --> 00:52:16,523
Very truly yours,
señorita Cleotilde Guarnizo,
676
00:52:16,591 --> 00:52:21,530
identity card
number 79-454-248."
677
00:52:24,332 --> 00:52:26,164
She likes me.
678
00:52:26,234 --> 00:52:28,500
Of course she likes me.
679
00:52:28,571 --> 00:52:32,167
I may have a big behind but
I also have a big heart.
680
00:52:32,241 --> 00:52:35,234
♪
681
00:52:35,311 --> 00:52:38,804
Get in the water, mayor.
It's nice and warm.
682
00:52:39,649 --> 00:52:40,878
Hello...
683
00:52:47,089 --> 00:52:49,081
Come on mayor... come on!
684
00:52:49,159 --> 00:52:52,493
♪
685
00:53:23,261 --> 00:53:26,594
On the count of three
we dive in, ok. Ready?
686
00:53:26,663 --> 00:53:27,495
No, no no no, no.
687
00:53:27,565 --> 00:53:30,501
We only live once, dive in!
688
00:53:31,603 --> 00:53:35,405
♪
689
00:54:06,539 --> 00:54:07,665
Honey...
690
00:54:08,941 --> 00:54:12,343
tonight we are supposed
to announce our goals.
691
00:54:15,482 --> 00:54:20,887
I plan to announce that
you and I are in love.
692
00:54:22,522 --> 00:54:27,222
Magnolia, we've talked about
this before, haven't we?
693
00:54:27,294 --> 00:54:31,732
What ever happens in this
house is nobody's business.
694
00:54:31,798 --> 00:54:35,860
You're such a follower.
Always in the Mayor's shadow.
695
00:54:35,936 --> 00:54:39,599
Why don't you do what you want? You
can be a leader too.
696
00:54:42,475 --> 00:54:46,038
If you tell our secret to
anyone, you'll regret it.
697
00:54:46,113 --> 00:54:48,105
I'm warning you.
698
00:54:50,684 --> 00:54:52,415
I told Cleotilde.
699
00:54:54,955 --> 00:54:58,448
How dare you tell her
after I told you not to?
700
00:54:58,526 --> 00:55:01,086
Magnolia Francisca
Morales Rodriguez,
701
00:55:01,162 --> 00:55:05,827
you betrayed my trust.
I will never forgive you.
702
00:55:05,900 --> 00:55:09,360
I will never, ever rub
your dirty feet again.
703
00:55:10,304 --> 00:55:11,533
Good!
704
00:55:11,605 --> 00:55:14,040
You're a lousy
rubber, anyway!
705
00:55:26,254 --> 00:55:29,714
Mayor, do you think it would
be possible that I take
706
00:55:29,792 --> 00:55:31,987
a more leading position?
707
00:55:33,261 --> 00:55:36,960
I used to be a nurse,
but I can be a doctor.
708
00:55:37,033 --> 00:55:40,128
Ceci, Anything is possible.
709
00:55:43,372 --> 00:55:44,568
You do it.
710
00:55:48,878 --> 00:55:51,006
(cheering)
711
00:55:51,080 --> 00:55:54,244
♪
712
00:56:03,760 --> 00:56:08,256
When we created the female time,
we proposed that women should
713
00:56:08,332 --> 00:56:12,394
find something about themselves
that they wanted to change.
714
00:56:12,469 --> 00:56:17,271
But also to celebrate the things
they love most about themselves.
715
00:56:18,075 --> 00:56:23,242
If there is one thing us women
know how to do, it is to love.
716
00:56:23,314 --> 00:56:31,848
We love unconditionally, we love
foolishly, we love blindly.
717
00:56:36,059 --> 00:56:41,055
I want to say, I am in
love with Cleotilde!
718
00:56:41,132 --> 00:56:42,725
(gasps)
719
00:56:45,102 --> 00:56:47,095
And I am in love with Rosalba!
720
00:56:47,172 --> 00:56:49,732
(cheering)
721
00:56:53,144 --> 00:56:55,636
I am in love with Cecilia!
722
00:57:03,222 --> 00:57:05,554
Emmm... I' in love
with Magnolia...
723
00:57:13,966 --> 00:57:16,367
And La Gringa and I...
724
00:57:18,137 --> 00:57:19,230
are in love!
725
00:57:21,207 --> 00:57:22,903
No gross, no way...
726
00:57:34,354 --> 00:57:39,793
♪
727
00:58:46,228 --> 00:58:48,357
What do you smell, Hermanita?
728
00:58:49,998 --> 00:58:51,296
What is it?
729
00:59:01,743 --> 00:59:06,842
"I smell a robust, slightly
acidic mixture of minerals,
730
00:59:06,916 --> 00:59:12,321
salts, perspiration, and musk. large
amounts of musk.
731
00:59:15,491 --> 00:59:17,551
I smell a man."
732
00:59:17,627 --> 00:59:20,359
♪
733
00:59:58,670 --> 00:59:59,797
I think he is mute.
734
00:59:59,871 --> 01:00:01,737
No, no. I'm not...
I'm not mute.
735
01:00:01,806 --> 01:00:02,865
(gasps)
736
01:00:03,674 --> 01:00:05,075
That's too bad...
737
01:00:06,144 --> 01:00:07,077
Who are you?
738
01:00:07,145 --> 01:00:09,944
Ahhh... my name is Gordon Smith.
739
01:00:10,949 --> 01:00:12,646
He's so dirty!
740
01:00:12,718 --> 01:00:14,151
Take off your clothes...
741
01:00:14,219 --> 01:00:15,847
I could give
him a tongue bath...
742
01:00:15,920 --> 01:00:19,881
Don't get exited, we want to
wash you, you smell like a man!
743
01:00:22,895 --> 01:00:25,762
Who sent you Mr. Gordon?
744
01:00:26,598 --> 01:00:29,159
Sent me? No, no,
no, nobody sent me.
745
01:00:29,235 --> 01:00:32,034
I'm a journalist. I'm a...
746
01:00:32,104 --> 01:00:36,838
I heard about a story
about a town of Amazon, giant
747
01:00:36,909 --> 01:00:42,372
women that found some way
to impregnate themselves...
748
01:00:42,449 --> 01:00:44,281
What do you want?
749
01:00:44,351 --> 01:00:46,148
I want to write a
story about you.
750
01:00:49,155 --> 01:00:53,856
Do you mind stepping outside
while we discuss your presence?
751
01:00:54,461 --> 01:00:56,486
Sure... yeah, yeah...
752
01:00:59,032 --> 01:01:01,695
Julia Morales is going
to eat him alive...
753
01:01:01,768 --> 01:01:02,792
I'll... I'll stay here...
754
01:01:02,869 --> 01:01:04,531
She doesn't mean it that way.
755
01:01:04,604 --> 01:01:07,369
I assure you, we do
not feast on humans.
756
01:01:29,697 --> 01:01:31,563
(rooster crows)
757
01:01:44,379 --> 01:01:46,575
Señoritas, por favor! Basta!
758
01:01:46,648 --> 01:01:47,638
(Girl) Bitch!
759
01:01:48,716 --> 01:01:52,586
Señor Gordon, you have
caused total disorder.
760
01:01:52,654 --> 01:01:55,089
I'm going to have to ask
you to leave, but it's going
761
01:01:55,157 --> 01:01:58,457
to be dark soon...
you can leave in the morning.
762
01:01:58,527 --> 01:02:02,692
The ladies will attend
to whatever you need.
763
01:02:16,312 --> 01:02:20,874
♪
764
01:02:24,521 --> 01:02:27,013
(Woman) I bet he tastes
sweet like flan!
765
01:02:28,491 --> 01:02:32,019
Men might be the enemy but we
love some of those enemies...
766
01:02:32,095 --> 01:02:34,724
Ahhh... Mr Gordon
is the only real man
767
01:02:34,798 --> 01:02:37,428
we've seen in such a long time.
768
01:02:37,501 --> 01:02:39,026
We don't want
to look like whores,
769
01:02:39,103 --> 01:02:41,298
we want to feel like whores.
770
01:02:42,372 --> 01:02:43,806
Aya yay...
771
01:02:44,909 --> 01:02:47,504
I'm clearly into men.
772
01:02:48,779 --> 01:02:52,409
Señoritas, don't let our
peace be destroyed by your
773
01:02:52,483 --> 01:02:56,352
hormones. No one
is to talk to him.
774
01:02:56,420 --> 01:02:58,685
If he writes about us,
he is going to ruin us.
775
01:02:58,756 --> 01:03:01,920
So... who's going to
sleep with him first?
776
01:03:12,770 --> 01:03:13,567
Hi.
777
01:03:13,637 --> 01:03:14,765
Hey.
778
01:03:16,208 --> 01:03:19,906
You were interviewing
rebels... ummm...
779
01:03:19,978 --> 01:03:24,746
I was wondering if
you came across my son...
780
01:03:24,816 --> 01:03:28,378
his name is
Angel Alberto Albaca.
781
01:03:28,453 --> 01:03:34,450
He's short, he has
beautiful eyes...
782
01:03:35,327 --> 01:03:38,890
I thought all of you
didn't want any men here...
783
01:03:38,965 --> 01:03:41,457
We want the men we love...
784
01:03:43,002 --> 01:03:44,492
I'll do everything
I can to find him.
785
01:03:44,569 --> 01:03:46,869
Oh... gracias!
786
01:03:58,017 --> 01:03:59,383
Buenos dias...
787
01:04:00,052 --> 01:04:01,487
Buenos dias, Mayor.
788
01:04:03,957 --> 01:04:05,982
Ah, so this
is a church,
789
01:04:06,058 --> 01:04:08,858
I don't see any statutes of God.
790
01:04:08,929 --> 01:04:10,989
God is not in stiff things.
791
01:04:11,064 --> 01:04:15,000
It is in land,
plantas, animales.
792
01:04:17,371 --> 01:04:20,136
We have decided
not to talk to you.
793
01:04:20,440 --> 01:04:21,601
Good luck.
794
01:04:23,278 --> 01:04:26,975
Mayor, listen...
I'm not your typical gringo.
795
01:04:27,047 --> 01:04:29,039
What kind of gringo are you?
796
01:04:31,953 --> 01:04:36,652
I'm the kind who thinks what
you're doing here is amazing.
797
01:04:36,723 --> 01:04:40,593
Tell me Mr. Gordon, what do you
expect to get from this story?
798
01:04:40,662 --> 01:04:44,190
Fortune and glory...
a Pulitzer...
799
01:04:45,900 --> 01:04:47,163
Respect.
800
01:04:48,069 --> 01:04:50,629
Well... with regards to respect,
801
01:04:50,705 --> 01:04:52,469
I believe we want
the same thing.
802
01:04:55,778 --> 01:04:58,611
Who knew that a
man and a woman could
803
01:04:58,680 --> 01:05:00,239
actually want the same thing?
804
01:05:01,317 --> 01:05:02,546
No...
805
01:05:02,618 --> 01:05:05,053
I believe you men want to
prove something to the world.
806
01:05:05,120 --> 01:05:06,611
Make your mark.
807
01:05:06,689 --> 01:05:09,591
Why don't you just try to
prove something to yourself?
808
01:05:12,461 --> 01:05:14,896
You know, you could
be an example of what's
809
01:05:14,964 --> 01:05:17,127
possible for women
everywhere, you know,
810
01:05:17,200 --> 01:05:20,135
start building
towns, free of men.
811
01:05:21,303 --> 01:05:23,169
You could become
a part of history.
812
01:05:23,238 --> 01:05:26,038
I could make you
a part of history.
813
01:05:27,977 --> 01:05:30,776
Come on...
sit down.
814
01:05:30,846 --> 01:05:33,544
Your story needs to be told.
815
01:05:38,021 --> 01:05:39,386
Ok.
816
01:05:39,456 --> 01:05:41,584
I don't even know
where to begin...
817
01:05:42,926 --> 01:05:45,020
Why did you talk to him?
818
01:05:46,162 --> 01:05:48,927
He told me we can
lead by our example.
819
01:05:48,999 --> 01:05:51,025
We can change what
divides the world.
820
01:05:51,701 --> 01:05:54,500
That article is gonna make
tourists want to observe us,
821
01:05:54,571 --> 01:05:56,598
like rare animals on safari.
822
01:05:57,308 --> 01:05:58,936
This isn't about him.
823
01:05:59,743 --> 01:06:02,144
I saw the way you look at him.
824
01:06:04,148 --> 01:06:05,582
What do you mean?
825
01:06:07,585 --> 01:06:09,815
Maybe you still like men.
826
01:06:33,678 --> 01:06:35,010
Here...
827
01:06:37,549 --> 01:06:39,381
Take me with you.
828
01:06:39,451 --> 01:06:43,980
I lost my virginity to the holy
spirit and I'm ready for more!
829
01:06:44,056 --> 01:06:47,618
Yeah... I was going to
show you the boa...
830
01:06:48,961 --> 01:06:52,727
I'm flattered ladies, but
ah... I really do have to go.
831
01:06:52,798 --> 01:06:53,993
Oohh!
832
01:06:54,066 --> 01:06:56,559
Well, you don't know what
you're missing, Mr. Gordon.
833
01:06:56,636 --> 01:06:57,365
Yeah.
834
01:07:02,008 --> 01:07:03,340
Adios...
835
01:07:08,648 --> 01:07:11,551
Señor Gordon, I don't
think you should write
836
01:07:11,618 --> 01:07:13,848
the article about this town.
837
01:07:14,487 --> 01:07:17,889
I'm sorry, I have a job I have
to do, I don't wanna get fired.
838
01:07:17,957 --> 01:07:19,950
I earned respect,
and so can you.
839
01:07:20,427 --> 01:07:21,417
How?
840
01:07:22,162 --> 01:07:23,891
Just look in the mirror.
841
01:07:25,731 --> 01:07:27,394
I can't.
842
01:07:28,001 --> 01:07:30,698
I'm sorry. I've got a
story I've got to file.
843
01:07:34,341 --> 01:07:35,639
Do it for us!
844
01:07:41,483 --> 01:07:43,452
I'll think about it.
845
01:07:43,518 --> 01:07:47,010
♪
846
01:08:13,983 --> 01:08:17,214
(Rafael) The gringo
left flowers and tampons
847
01:08:17,285 --> 01:08:20,688
and perfume behind.
He went back to the land of men,
848
01:08:20,756 --> 01:08:25,456
but God still needed
him for his master plan.
849
01:08:28,497 --> 01:08:29,521
Psst!
850
01:08:31,433 --> 01:08:32,332
Psst!
851
01:08:35,372 --> 01:08:37,033
(Angel) Are you a ghost?
852
01:08:37,106 --> 01:08:38,665
(Campo) Shhh...
just pretend to be dead,
853
01:08:38,741 --> 01:08:40,642
that way we will
be free from the war.
854
01:08:45,682 --> 01:08:48,583
I thought they killed
you... Back in the town.
855
01:08:48,651 --> 01:08:51,087
Yes, I pretended to be dead, even to my
wife to escape,
856
01:08:51,154 --> 01:08:54,124
but the rebels caught me sneezing...
(sneeze)
857
01:08:57,761 --> 01:08:59,229
Someone's coming!
858
01:09:26,791 --> 01:09:29,124
We're trying to
find out home Mariquita,
859
01:09:29,193 --> 01:09:30,661
do you know where it is?
860
01:09:31,562 --> 01:09:32,860
I might.
861
01:09:32,930 --> 01:09:38,029
My mother...
is there... Cecilia.
862
01:09:39,971 --> 01:09:40,961
Please...
863
01:09:52,284 --> 01:09:55,345
I can't go back, but I
can give you the map.
864
01:10:04,563 --> 01:10:08,160
(voices)
865
01:10:15,441 --> 01:10:19,879
Cleo! Cleo wake up!
Wake up, I hear voices...
866
01:10:19,946 --> 01:10:24,145
Go back to sleep...
and I'm still mad at you.
867
01:10:24,884 --> 01:10:26,876
Male voices.
868
01:10:47,141 --> 01:10:48,404
Rosalba?
869
01:10:49,476 --> 01:10:50,603
Campo...
870
01:10:56,950 --> 01:10:58,179
Angel!
871
01:10:58,552 --> 01:10:59,611
Mama!
872
01:11:05,159 --> 01:11:08,153
Ay! Ay! Jacinto
Jimenez, is that you?
873
01:11:08,229 --> 01:11:10,130
(Jacinto) Mi amor!
874
01:11:12,100 --> 01:11:13,624
I am back!
875
01:11:13,701 --> 01:11:17,195
Take again my post as mayor.
876
01:11:17,272 --> 01:11:18,672
I am mayor now.
877
01:11:19,174 --> 01:11:20,437
You're back!
878
01:11:22,010 --> 01:11:23,673
We thought you were...
879
01:11:24,946 --> 01:11:29,441
I'm mentally unsound.
But hey, I'm alive.
880
01:11:29,517 --> 01:11:31,214
(laughs)
881
01:11:37,325 --> 01:11:38,624
I will keep you safe.
882
01:11:38,694 --> 01:11:41,994
This town has been
safe without you.
883
01:11:43,632 --> 01:11:47,330
Rosalba! If you
walk away, I will have
884
01:11:47,403 --> 01:11:51,465
to arrest you for not
following the mayor's orders.
885
01:11:52,875 --> 01:11:54,310
Where are the other men?
886
01:11:54,378 --> 01:11:56,039
I have no idea.
887
01:11:58,347 --> 01:11:59,576
Son?
888
01:12:00,784 --> 01:12:02,844
This is my new girlfriend.
889
01:12:02,919 --> 01:12:06,150
You do remember Magnolia,
your baby sitter, don't you?
890
01:12:08,458 --> 01:12:11,087
You are dating my nanny, mami?
891
01:12:11,161 --> 01:12:13,756
♪
892
01:12:15,632 --> 01:12:17,362
Sexy!
893
01:12:23,407 --> 01:12:26,207
Are these the only
clean clothes you have?
894
01:12:26,277 --> 01:12:29,303
Now you can feel what
is like to wear a dress.
895
01:12:30,046 --> 01:12:33,711
Do we have to sleep here until
you women decide what to do?
896
01:12:37,387 --> 01:12:38,947
Buenas noches...
897
01:12:43,628 --> 01:12:45,062
Oyeme bien...
898
01:12:45,129 --> 01:12:49,692
I'd rather go back to the city, where the
womens obey the men.
899
01:12:49,767 --> 01:12:51,702
Like everywhere
else in the world.
900
01:12:53,805 --> 01:12:55,468
I feel castrated.
901
01:12:57,576 --> 01:12:59,840
Those men aren't
staying forever right?
902
01:12:59,911 --> 01:13:02,541
You might want them gone
but I want my son near me.
903
01:13:02,614 --> 01:13:04,606
Are they gonna start
charging us for sex?
904
01:13:04,683 --> 01:13:06,675
The should cook for us now.
905
01:13:07,453 --> 01:13:09,045
Now that we are in
power, we have to defend
906
01:13:09,120 --> 01:13:11,352
our female rights
with our ovarios...
907
01:13:11,423 --> 01:13:13,619
No! What about
defending men's rights?
908
01:13:13,692 --> 01:13:16,184
(all shouting)
909
01:13:19,231 --> 01:13:20,597
Ok! Ok!
Wait! Wait!
910
01:13:21,200 --> 01:13:24,068
What happened with resolving
conflict the female way?
911
01:13:24,136 --> 01:13:27,596
Without violence.
What do we women do best?
912
01:13:28,241 --> 01:13:29,970
Ahhh... fuck!
913
01:13:31,610 --> 01:13:32,806
Talk.
914
01:13:32,879 --> 01:13:33,869
Oh, that.
915
01:13:43,122 --> 01:13:44,647
Ladies...
916
01:13:44,724 --> 01:13:46,249
and you.
917
01:13:46,326 --> 01:13:49,161
We're gathered today,
so women and men can
918
01:13:49,230 --> 01:13:51,255
do something very difficult.
919
01:13:51,331 --> 01:13:52,731
Communicate.
920
01:13:52,799 --> 01:13:53,732
Women talk too much.
921
01:13:53,800 --> 01:13:55,429
And men don't listen.
922
01:13:56,003 --> 01:14:00,373
We won't admit anyone unless
he adapts to our peaceful ways.
923
01:14:00,441 --> 01:14:03,468
Here, we're all
leaders and equals.
924
01:14:03,544 --> 01:14:07,208
No, no, no - We all know
that you and I are not equals.
925
01:14:07,281 --> 01:14:10,480
Well, I think that it is
only fair that my properties
926
01:14:10,552 --> 01:14:14,682
and my post be returned to me,
and I also want to get my wife
927
01:14:14,755 --> 01:14:20,195
back, because she is still,
of course, my wife, isn't she?
928
01:14:20,262 --> 01:14:23,789
Or are you ladies going to tell
me that Rosalba also became a...
929
01:14:23,864 --> 01:14:25,423
well, you know...
930
01:14:30,071 --> 01:14:32,596
Well... why don't you
ask her yourself?
931
01:14:35,777 --> 01:14:37,177
Rosalba?
932
01:14:37,612 --> 01:14:38,739
Mamita?
933
01:14:41,217 --> 01:14:44,186
Oh... ok...
934
01:14:46,388 --> 01:14:47,981
you are confused...
935
01:14:48,056 --> 01:14:50,720
The only one confused is you.
936
01:14:50,793 --> 01:14:53,819
Like the time you made love to
me and called me "Ubaldina"?
937
01:14:55,130 --> 01:14:56,997
That is confusing!
938
01:15:07,243 --> 01:15:09,508
I am sorry if I hurt you.
939
01:15:10,012 --> 01:15:12,346
Can you please forgive me?
940
01:15:12,416 --> 01:15:17,581
♪
941
01:15:17,653 --> 01:15:20,556
Rosalba... can we stay?
942
01:15:26,062 --> 01:15:28,191
Why are you asking
for permission?
943
01:15:28,265 --> 01:15:28,994
Jacinto!
944
01:15:29,066 --> 01:15:31,001
Virgelina! Callate!
945
01:15:31,068 --> 01:15:33,936
This is our town!
She belongs to me!
946
01:15:34,004 --> 01:15:35,200
(screaming)
947
01:15:42,180 --> 01:15:44,081
(Cleotilde) Mine
is bigger than yours.
948
01:15:48,485 --> 01:15:49,316
Angel?
949
01:15:50,421 --> 01:15:53,687
You're going to let a bunch of
silly womens bullet you around?
950
01:15:53,758 --> 01:15:54,691
Huh?
951
01:15:54,759 --> 01:15:56,022
Mire este!
952
01:15:56,094 --> 01:15:59,292
And you! Huh? Are you
turning your back on me too?
953
01:15:59,797 --> 01:16:01,698
I owe this woman.
954
01:16:02,800 --> 01:16:08,000
As stubborn and as bossy
as she is, I respect her.
955
01:16:08,072 --> 01:16:09,870
You are traitors!
Traitors!
956
01:16:09,941 --> 01:16:11,034
(gasp)
957
01:16:11,109 --> 01:16:15,605
Que todas son lesbianas! Lesbianas,
lesbianas!
958
01:16:15,681 --> 01:16:25,023
♪
959
01:16:25,090 --> 01:16:26,956
Where the hell is my story?
960
01:16:27,026 --> 01:16:29,257
The town, the women,
our cover story?
961
01:16:29,328 --> 01:16:31,695
You know boss, I was kidding
myself, I mean come on?
962
01:16:31,764 --> 01:16:34,097
A town of women
surviving without men?
963
01:16:34,166 --> 01:16:35,760
It, it's, it's
imposible, crazy,
964
01:16:35,835 --> 01:16:37,667
a fairy tale, a myth, a legend!
965
01:16:37,737 --> 01:16:38,760
Oh my god...
966
01:16:38,837 --> 01:16:41,671
please do not
tell me that you killed
967
01:16:41,740 --> 01:16:43,972
the story to protect them...
968
01:16:44,044 --> 01:16:45,842
Why would I do that?
969
01:16:45,912 --> 01:16:50,941
Wow. That must have been
some really great vagina.
970
01:16:51,017 --> 01:16:52,883
You wanna know
something, Gordon?
971
01:16:52,952 --> 01:16:58,859
Men may have the will,
women will always have the way.
972
01:17:02,629 --> 01:17:05,189
(Rafael) I guess in the
end, Gordon found something
973
01:17:05,265 --> 01:17:09,101
more important than a
story... a conscience.
974
01:17:09,170 --> 01:17:10,262
Hah!
975
01:17:10,336 --> 01:17:13,101
An American with a conscience?
976
01:17:13,173 --> 01:17:18,636
♪
977
01:17:44,072 --> 01:17:48,305
You don't tell them to leave,
I will I have to leave.
978
01:17:48,610 --> 01:17:50,545
I can't do that.
979
01:17:50,612 --> 01:17:53,707
So? What you gonna do?
980
01:17:54,649 --> 01:17:56,311
I have to do what's right.
981
01:17:56,384 --> 01:18:00,686
Well that's...
very unbossy of you.
982
01:18:31,555 --> 01:18:35,116
Ladies... gentleman...
983
01:18:37,294 --> 01:18:40,389
it is time we stop
arguing about who is
984
01:18:40,464 --> 01:18:45,402
stronger, or wiser,
or who is right.
985
01:18:47,104 --> 01:18:51,940
We need to live together
as a society of equals.
986
01:18:52,509 --> 01:18:57,004
We learned to live without you,
but we'd rather live with you.
987
01:18:59,149 --> 01:19:03,986
I want us all to be happy,
more than to be right.
988
01:19:20,104 --> 01:19:22,164
(Rafael) El diablo was defeated.
989
01:19:22,240 --> 01:19:24,836
Life was finally how
God intended it to be.
990
01:19:24,910 --> 01:19:26,844
The mens on one side,
the womens on the other.
991
01:19:26,911 --> 01:19:30,279
♪
992
01:19:57,509 --> 01:19:58,841
Cleo, wait!
993
01:20:03,583 --> 01:20:04,846
Don't leave.
994
01:20:07,653 --> 01:20:09,816
I need to know.
995
01:20:10,523 --> 01:20:14,119
Do you love men or
do you love women?
996
01:20:23,803 --> 01:20:25,432
I love you.
997
01:20:27,808 --> 01:20:32,109
♪
998
01:21:12,621 --> 01:21:15,318
(Rafael) Sure... you think
this story has a happy ending
999
01:21:15,390 --> 01:21:17,485
because Rosalba finally
learned that she didn't
1000
01:21:17,560 --> 01:21:19,893
need to control everything...
1001
01:21:25,468 --> 01:21:29,303
Virglina and Angel blessed
the village with a baby.
1002
01:21:29,372 --> 01:21:32,706
They're not worried if
it's a boy or a girl...
1003
01:21:33,676 --> 01:21:36,771
With his second chance,
Campo Elias became a decent,
1004
01:21:36,846 --> 01:21:40,078
not lying and cheating
dog of a husband to Ubaldina,
1005
01:21:40,149 --> 01:21:42,482
and hopes to be
assistant mayor one day...
1006
01:21:42,552 --> 01:21:44,350
as soon as he learns to read.
1007
01:21:46,089 --> 01:21:48,423
Julio stopped
having to worry about
1008
01:21:48,492 --> 01:21:50,393
squeezing into a size eight...
1009
01:21:51,962 --> 01:21:54,658
La Gringa and Lucrecia
adopted four children from
1010
01:21:54,731 --> 01:21:58,430
a nearby village
and taught them... biology?
1011
01:22:00,004 --> 01:22:02,996
Cecilia learned to lead,
now she might have to learn
1012
01:22:03,072 --> 01:22:04,905
no to be so bossy.
1013
01:22:14,618 --> 01:22:17,986
Women and men worked
together as long as men
1014
01:22:18,055 --> 01:22:19,854
remembered their place.
1015
01:22:22,494 --> 01:22:25,190
The peoples of
Mariquita finally chose to
1016
01:22:25,262 --> 01:22:27,596
live happily ever after.
1017
01:22:28,633 --> 01:22:31,467
Although that didn't mean
that the Lord was not going
1018
01:22:31,536 --> 01:22:33,528
to send them a real Savior.
1019
01:22:33,605 --> 01:22:36,769
This is not a happy
ending until I say so...
1020
01:22:38,343 --> 01:22:40,244
In the name of God,
1021
01:22:40,311 --> 01:22:44,578
I am here to absolve
you of your filthy sins.
1022
01:22:45,617 --> 01:22:48,382
Are you ready to
receive me, my child?
1023
01:22:55,760 --> 01:23:00,256
♪